Reproof

I think when we close ourselves off to reproof and correction, what we are actually doing is putting a pause on the growth of anything good in our life. It's stopping in the middle of the road. Settling for where we are at and embracing complacency and pride.

That's fairly simple to understand, but I'm often convicted of it. It's hard to receive correction. It's easy to get angry and prideful when we hear it, and sometimes when we hear it, part of the issue is that we're not really hearing a loving voice. Pride is a deep and ugly thing, because it often infects the voice of the corrector too.

When we talk about the crucial need we have to be open, and correct one another, be open to the idea that we all have pride inside of us that also wants to be correcting others, just as much as we don't want to be corrected. I mean, it feels nice to be right doesn't it? Who doesn't want to be the best at everything? "What a joyous day it is to wake up and humbly and slap some correction on everyone I see". Some times we actually get so caught up in it that we consider it our calling - to simply tell everyone else why they're wrong and never hear a word of reproof for ourselves.

At a more simplistic level, we are all hardwired to reinforce something we already believe to be correct, or to comfort ourselves that we're already in the right - rather than swallow those hard pills that may say we're in the wrong.

This topic is something you can't evade in the Proverbs, and in tons of other teachings throughout the bible. Here is a link to 33 different proverbs emphatically stressing the importance of reproof. In a famous verse, James tells us to "count it all joy" when we face hard times and are corrected, because that's what makes us strong.

The author of Hebrews takes it to a whole other level, discussing this matter in chapter 12:

 As you endure this divine discipline, remember that God is treating you as his own children. Who ever heard of a child who is never disciplined by its father? If God doesn’t discipline you as he does all of his children, it means that you are illegitimate and are not really his children at all.  Since we respected our earthly fathers who disciplined us, shouldn’t we submit even more to the discipline of the Father of our spirits, and live forever?

If you aren't receiving God's discipline as a child you are either "illegitimate" or "not really his children at all." That's a heavy hitter.

Communities of believers will choke if they are not a space where they trust one another enough to reprove each other.  Going back to something I said at the beginning, I think where accountability and trust fails can sometimes be because of a past hurt. People, parents, ministers, friends - many of us have experiences with loved ones condemning us and lashing out, rather than correcting us with love as a brother or sister.

And some of that pain that holds us back runs deep. So I don't want to just throw a verse at you or say "so PRAY about it and BE HEALED."

What I do want to say though, is that the God who wants to heal you is in the room with you as you read this. He has been on the journey through each scar you've received, and there is no one better at healing than He is. He knows you, your pains and past, intimately.

And as we grow through the difficult, frustrating and long process of prying ourselves open to correction more and more, we have to come to know God as the best Father ever, to really gain any trust. Pain from the past makes it hard to open up to correction like that, but no one is better at it than God Himself. He's the Father above all fathers, and He is yours, personally.

The last thing I want to say is that the process of opening up and growing in trust of God as a gentle, loving Father is something that is a massive victory for all other Christians around you. This process that has to do with things that are seriously personal and deep - will enable God to abound in those around you as well. I hope that isn't an extra burden to carry, but rather an perspective that is an encouragement.

By each of us coming to really "count it all joy" and love reproof as we are exhorted to in the Proverbs, we learn to see the love and good in this. We learn to allow the accountability, reproof and correction that Jesus calls us to do in community with one another, to come about in an actual good and healthy way.

Matthew 18:15-16 - Jesus' words:

 “If another believer sins against you, go privately and point out the offense. If the other person listens and confesses it, you have won that person back. But if you are unsuccessful, take one or two others with you and go back again, so that everything you say may be confirmed by two or three witnesses.

James 5:16

Confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The earnest prayer of a righteous person has great power and produces wonderful results.

The bible doesn't shut up about this topic for a reason, I think :)